I must.

By Keri Kenney
•
05 Aug, 2020
•

I must share truth.

Which means I must be truthful.

with myself.

and with the World.

What do I need?

What does the world need?

How do I feel?

How does the world feel?

Where is my focus?

Where is the world's focus?

Questions that seem to be answered only by more questions…

sacredly simple and synchronized questions

that keep me curious and cautious

and as compassionate as possible

as I move at the speed of trust and keeping shining light on truth

to seek out more truth

as I find and feel my way through all the moments and all the madness:

What am I doing?

and why am I doing it?

What is a must?

and what is a must not?

(insert giant sigh and smile... ahhh the work the effort that does not go wasted)

The world we live in loves to keep us busy and distracted.

Exhausted.

Under supported.

and way over s t r e t c h e d.

It’s truth.

and we must stay with truth.

No matter how uncomfortable it may be.

Otherwise it is UN-truth:

A’satya

and How many of us are doing that right now -

Staying in the space of untruth due to the familiarity

and avoiding the true truth due to the discomfort?

or keeping the senses closed off tightly to what is happening behind the privilege of choosing to see/taste/smell/hear/hold the pain?

How many of us right now are:

Bypassing our own comfort to extend it to another?

Numbing our pain?

Forgetting our voice?

Disconnected from who it is we truly are?

and who it is we are to one another?

Its Easy to do any time,

and especially now.

but this keeps us from the truth -

it keeps us from healing -

and I feel it is on purpose -

I know it is on purpose -

to keep us further from the center of our oneness and the center of solutions and possibility.

We are in a state of great shift and suck -

its true.

Trauma - racism - inequality -

and each of us grieving some sort of loss as we rebuild through this pandemic -

When there is so much gravity weighing on us we often forget we can rise beyond the pain and pressure -

We often forget that there's a bigger power that is cheering us on to choose differently -

and that there is a radical strength and power if we can keep our hearts open -

Especially when it is hard.

[ Open heart = Open mind ]

Everything here to teach us if we so allow.

the prerequisite: Stay with the discomfort.

We must.

These sensations of suffocation are reminders of truth -

Every discomfort holds lessons to be gained -

If we are willing to unlearn the comfort of comfort -

and learn to stay with discomfort -

Which leads to liberation -

Bliss -

Samadhi -

Ease -

The path of great discomfort leads us to the truest comfort:

Our Self our Centers each Other.

Does that make sense?

It’s okay if not.

But think about it:

When was the last time you were truly at comfort in your skin and heart and mind -

At ease?

Able to breathe freely?

Able to be authentically you ?

Able to focus and find the light on through?

and I hate to assume here,

But my guess is it's been awhile…

Which reminds me over and over again:

There is still great work to do -

and we need to do it
and we need each other -

We are not alone in this process that is process -

Divine beings having a very real and raw human experience -

And the responsibility is each ours:

Remember.

Repair.

Repeat.

We cannot give up.

We must be the truth.

Which takes me to this moment where I am sitting here and allowing the words to flow:

What matters, Keri,

What matters?

You and I matter.

Us.

and our ability to breathe.

and Be.

to know we are safe.

A part of and belong.

But are we safe?

and do we feel we belong?

I know some are and some are not.

I know some do and some do not.

This makes me uncomfortable.

Truly uncomfortable.

This idea
disguised as truth
of selection and singularity.

This clear distinction of who has and who does not.

I can't breathe there.

That space has taken so much from me

and so much from our world and people.

I choose collective.

I choose change.

I choose compassion.

Which means I must stay with the discomfort.

The deepness.

The darkness.

The vastness of all that have and has been forgotten -

Here,
yet alone.

It is purposefully painful.

Breathe keri breathe

I must hold the truth without holding my breath.

And isn't that a privilege these days?

To breathe and breathe freely.

I must breathe so I can see

The world must breathe so it can see

- and see clearly all that keeps taking my breath away

All that is taking so much life away.

This is an abundance world.

Have we forgotten the truth?

We must remember as we hold the conundrums,

complexities,

and vicious & virtuous cycles of expansion & contractions

tension & release

challenge to change -

I breathe into my that s p a c e.

I trust it.

It is truth.

and takes me to where I need to be.

even if it is uncomfortable.

It is the tool to unlearning all my conditioning of comfort and what I have accepted and what I could allow -

It is the vehicle to my soul -

My Truest Self -

and reminds me over and over again:

All are worthy

Of breath

Of comfort

Of life.

Of dignity

Ground

and Grace.

So -

What is it that I/we must do then?

I/we must see the conditioning and learning of ignorance and ingrained worthlessness -

I/we must see all the ways in which I/we live against the path of freedom and justice and truth -

I/we must see where our fear keep us frozen and our circumstance keeps us comfortable -

and uncomfortable.

can we stay?

Can we breathe?

Can we choose to be with it all?

In hopes of choosing & creating something that holds us all?

I must see when and where and why I am silent.

Where do I silence my discomfort and swallow my sacred rage -

I must keep reminding mySelf over and over and over again:

You are worthy of being heard.

You are worthy of sharing truth.

We all are.

We need our stories.

We need our struggles.

We need to shine light on all the shames.

The breaking through.

These pandemic months have been the most grounding and groundless moments of my life.

The conundrum always continues.

But the cycle must not.

And that's what I must do over and over again is break the cycles of ignorance and illusion that create shame and silence within me as well as all that is happening outside of me -

No Separation.

A calling in.

Never a calling out.

I must live into the remembering of who it is I am and the depth that I carry.

I must settle into my story and settle into my soul.

And listen to the truth that my traumas, tears and tenacity have given me:

My gifts found in the discomfort and dark.

I must see clearly so I can focus in to what is important:

Life

Liberty

Justice

Truth

Love

Belonging

All freely available if we allow ourselves to be free in exchange -

an unconditioning of conditions -

we can do it,

We Must.

It is what truly matters.

So much light and so much love and so much truth -

Shanti & Satya our lead and pace,

keri

Ps: this poem came first…

and then the blog

Let me know what you think

and if you are in agreement & alignment to what it is that is a must (love you).

We must breathe.

And breathe freely.